Lies of omission

and little white ones too

- You don’t tell your dad that he’s being an idiot if you know it’ll come back to bite not only you, but also your other family members, on the ass. (Even though you think he is being an idiot)

- You don’t tell your best friend that you absolutely hate her boyfriend and that you wish he would just crawl into a whole and die or something. (Even though you think he is and you wish he would)

- You don’t tell your wife her ass looks big in that new dress she bought. (You think she looks fat in everything these days, but there’s no point telling her that and risking an entire night sleeping on the coutch)

- You don’t tell your friends that they’re fat, even when they ask you.

- You don’t tell your great-aunt that her hat looks asinine, especially when you’re at her husbands funeral. That would just be uncalled for. (Despite the fact that it’s a really ugly hat and that the fact that your great-uncle died is no reason to dress up so badly)

- You don’t tell your friend who just broke up and who is heartbroken, that her ex was actually the biggest, the kindest and most gorgeous gentlemen you’ve ever encountered in your natural born life. You’d probably go with: “ well, he was a jerk anyway!” (Even though in any other situation you’d do him yourself)

- You don’t tell your very conservative and religious grandma, that you had sex before you got married. You don’t want to give the old fart a heart-attack. (Even though you did...a lot)

- You don’t tell your friends that the child they created is actually a demon child that should be put out of it’s own demonic and ugly misery. (Even though you bought a small hand-gun and left the child alone with it , supposedly unaware of it being loaded)


It does make one wonder who came up with the whole ‘stick-with-the-truth-and-you-can’t-go-wrong-thing’, right?