Go with the flow..

Lately I’ve been struggling to find words, words to express how I feel.
I know, I’m no writer, I’m not fooling anybody. Maybe I’m not even a blogger in the true sense, however lame that may sound. Nevertheless I try to make sense of my thoughts, words and feelings.
I try to put myself into words, and on paper, so I can see for my self. So I can make sense of it all.

Lately I haven’t been able too, maybe it’s because lately I’ve been trying so desperately to exploit the writers talent I don’t have in order to create something so brilliant and mind-blowing that it all seamed either nice at first site and shit in the end, or just trashcan-worthy-shit straightaway.

I guess that’s why lately I haven’t been able too put my thoughts into words anymore, because I try to god damn hard. Because I try to hard to create this perfect picture. The truth is though, my thoughts are almost never perfectly balanced, so to think that I could fit them into cute little entertaining and good story’s is just foolish.

My thoughts aren’t organized, and not all of them, hell a lot of them, won’t cut it in a good story. But I should just keep in mind that this hole scene, this hole writing down my thoughts thing, is to help me. It’s to help me understand myself, my motifs and why I do or don’t do the things I do and don’t do in my life…

I shouldn’t try so hard, it should come natural. I should just go with the flow when it comes to my thoughts and let my thoughts be what they are. Nothing more nothing less. No over analysed puns, no over the top alliterations, non of that crap, unless it’s natural. Cause if it’s not, you can tell.. and well, that just sucks.

So I guess it’s safe to say that I have now written the worse blog in ages, however there isn’t much fake about it…And really, that alleviates…